Any Male Readers, Run Screaming From This Post.
I had to have an ultra sound today as I have been having very irregular periods over the last few months and I wanted to get down to the bottom of it. Actually I just wanted to get on the pill to try and regulate them it’s my doctor wants to get down to the bottom of it.
I went to the doctor on Thursday and the male nurse that saw me heard the word Period come out of my mouth and announced that I needed a pap smear. As he was flying out the door to relay this to my doctor I had to shout after him that I was still, in fact, on my period.
“Well, um, uh, then…we have a problem.” Was his response. He ran out the door to discuss with the doctor and came back asking me when I would no longer be bleeding. I informed him that that was the whole problem. I do not know when I will stop because last month I didn’t stop at all. He got kind of flustered and said: “Ummm, I gotta go ask the doctor again.” As he flew out the door a second time he actually muttered: “I’m so glad I’m not a woman.”
My doctor finally came in and we discussed what was happening. She said the first thing she wanted to test for was to see if I was anemic or not. Ironically the way to test for this is to take blood. I asked if there was a blood test to see if you have diabetes. She said yes but that I should really be fasting when I do it so I told her to write down that test and I will do it some morning on my way to work.
The second thing she wanted to make sure about was that my ovaries and uterus were functioning properly. She wanted to make sure there are no cysts or what have you that might be possibly causing this bleeding. That brings us to today’s lovely visit to another doctor to have my insides checked.
When you have an ultra sound done they make you down 44 ounces of water an hour before your visit. I followed directions. I drank so much water I was sick to my stomach. Yet when I finally got into the examining room and they started using the little scanner looking thing, she told me that my bladder was not full and I would have to go out to the waiting room and drink more water. As you can imagine, drinking more water was the last thing I wanted to do, but I did it.
After about 45 minutes another girl came and took me in a different examining room. She said my bladder was full enough to see my uterus but not my ovaries. She went on further saying that it didn’t matter since they can take pictures of those when she does the probe.
My doctor conveniently forgot to mention that she had ordered a probe as well as the ultra sound. Oh, and it is just as invasive as it sounds. I’ll spare you the gory details, just know that it involves a camera at the end of a very long stick.
So yeah, Kelly was a very uncomfortable girl today.
I don’t know when I will hear back on the results of my tests today. I go in to get the blood work done Wednesday morning.
I’ll keep you posted.
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